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Cool Guy Holding a Soda

Monday, November 28, 2011


I wish Livejournal was still as active as it used to be, but I realize that it's as much my fault as everyone else's; I just don't post. Honestly it's because I don't have anything to post ABOUT, I don't do anything. But I do spend a lot of time cooking, and so I thought I would contribute a short list of what I consider to be the best cookbooks in my collection, ones that I would say are instrumental in getting me to where I am, culinarily speaking. This got long!Collapse )

Monday, October 24, 2011



Monday, September 19, 2011


images under the cutCollapse )

Monday, August 8, 2011



That's about as far off as if it were to have done this:

"Search by Book Title, Author, or ISBN"
Christian Inspiration

Did you mean: Anal Pleasure and Health?

Sunday, July 31, 2011


This is what I do for a hobby, seriously.Collapse )

Friday, July 29, 2011


In Memphis there was this law firm called "Gatti, Keltner, Bienvenu and Montesi, PLC" whose ads always reminded me of the "Head On" ads. I think they should embrace that.

Gatti, Keltner, Bienvenu and Montesi.
Gatti, Keltner, Bienvenu and Montesi.
Gatti, Keltner, Bienvenu and Montesi!
Apply directly to the lawsuit.

I'm going to try to write more in this again. It's been a while. Hi.

Saturday, June 25, 2011


Big friends list cut. Basically, if you haven't posted anything in over 4 years? bye. If you're thinking about picking up your lj again, and you see this, let me know, I'll add you back. No hard feelings on my part, just trying to streamline my online presence a little bit. I don't spend as much time on social sites as I used to, as many of you (that i cut) also seem to be experiencing.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

8:13AM - fuck you

You can't make this shit up.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

12:35AM - Catman's Fuckin' Banana Pudding: It's Rapturous!

2 eggs, separated, room temperature
1/2 cup sugar
2 1/4 cups whole milk
1 Tbsp flour
1/4 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 more Tbsp sugar
some cream of tartar or some shit, doesn't even matter

3 ripe bananas (make sure there are brown spots and shit, yo)
Nilla wafers (like, a ton. shit.)

Put the egg yolks in the top of a cold double boiler. Add 1/2 cup sugar, flour, and a 1/4 cup milk and cream them together until they are completely smooth and uniform in color and consistency. Turn on the heat under the double boiler, and slowly beat in the rest of the milk. Once it gets hot, start beating it together with a whisk and keep it moving, constantly. Beat faster or slower in order to maintain a steady temperature of 175-180 degrees F for 30 minutes or longer, until the custard is significantly thickened. For the love of god though, don't stop that shit moving because then it'll get all chunky and gross.

Once it's thick, take off the heat, add the vanilla extract, and keep on slowly beating that shit until it's cooled down to below 120 degrees F, or when you can stick your finger in it and it doesn't hurt like goddamn hell. Take the egg whites and sprinkle in like 1/4 tsp or so of cream of tartar if you want, you don't even have to, and start beating the crap out of those things until they start to turn white, then very slowly add the 2 Tbsp of sugar while still beating on high power until it's all incorporated and it forms soft peaks.

Pour a little bit of custard into the bottom of a baking dish, and then put down a layer of Nilla wafers. Thinly slice the bananas (like between 1/4 and 1/8 in, like 3-5 mm) and then put down a layer of those over top the nilla wafers, then carefully pour a thin layer of more custard over the top of that. Put another layer of nilla wafers down, another layer of bananas down, and then another layer of custard. Keep doing this until you finish with a layer of custard on top. Spread the meringue over the top of the custard, taking care to "seal" the edges, and then place into a 350 degree oven until the meringue is lightly browned on top.

Put that shit in the fridge and cool it down, bro. Then get a really big spoon and eat it all at once because seriously this shit is phenomenal. You can adjust the sugar in the custard to make it less sweet, but why would you want to? Also, don't use shitty reduced fat milk. Besides the fact that you should never buy reduced fat milk anyway for any reason, you can't make custard, something literally formed from fat and cholesterol, with reduced fat milk. Well you can, technically, but it also technically sucks ass.

Also a word to the wise: you can find in the stores now crap called "Omega-3 eggs" where they somehow make chickens produce eggs with more Omega-3 fatty acids, which I am really, really frightened of how they do that so whatever. But I've also noticed that Omega-3 eggs have a much, much stronger, eggier, sort of distracting flavor, especially in the yolks, so you may want to stay away from those where you don't exactly want to taste the eggs. I think they're real gross but probably if you make scrambled eggs or deviled eggs or some shit you probably won't taste them as much.

Monday, May 16, 2011


Dear Human,

You keep putting your squirrel feeder in a place that is only really convenient for birds to reach. Please pour seeds on ground and back away; it is difficult for me to keep having to climb the tree, hang off the branch, and pour the contents of the squirrel feeder all over the ground so I can eat the seeds more easily.



P.S. If you have any way to frighten off the chipmunk, that would be nice too.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

3:43AM - nyan nyan, nyan nyan, ni hao, nyan

Over the past couple weeks we have watched the following Anime:

Macross Zero
The Super Dimension Fortress Macross
Macross: Ai Oboete Imasu Ka?
Macross Plus
Macross 7
Macross 7: Encore
Macross 7: Dynamite
Macross 7: The Galaxy's Calling Me
Macross Frontier

Do you sense a trend? We've been meaning to do this for a long time, but it was hastened by the fact that Cherie has been really in to Sheryl Nome (I am partial to Ranka Lee, mind you). But now we can say that we are eligible for the Macross award, having sat through 57 episodes of Macross 7, 36 episodes of SDF Macross, and 25 episodes of Macross Frontier, and 5 episodes of Macross Zero, 4 episodes of Macross Plus plus the full length movie Ai Oboete Imasu Ka. That is 127 episodes of Macross. And it was awesome.

If you've never seen Macross, it is what Robotech thinks about every night as it cries itself to sleep. Robotech was pieced together haphazardly out of episodes of SDF Macross, Genesis Climber MOSPEADA, and Super Dimension Cavalry Southern Cross, three unrelated shows. But Macross is better in every way possible. It's deculture.

Now that we are through with Macross I don't know what I'm going to do with my life.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011


I put some birdfeeders outside since we live on a dead end street with lots of very large trees lining it, and I figured that the cats would love to watch the birds fly around.

I've seen, so far, cardinals, summer tanagers, goldfinches, housefinches, titmice, black-capped chickadees, grackles, carolina chickadees, one ruby-throated hummingbird (it hasn't come back), and crows. There've also been some chipping sparrows and tree sparrows poking around, but I've never seen them go after the seeds, just the dry dirt in the front yard. Of course the robins are everywhere and never shut up. Supposedly there have been some rock doves (majestic creatures), and mourning doves (they used to be called Carolina Turtledoves, after all), but I haven't seen them anywhere near the feeders either, just heard them. I haven't seen mockingbirds yet, either. There are also two other kinds of birds I haven't been able to identify yet. I wish I had a good camera to catch them with.

Monday, May 2, 2011



Sunday, May 1, 2011


Saturday, April 30, 2011


About once every three or four years I find a grocery store that has cans of Batchelor's Mushy Peas, which are one of the most delicious things in the entire world. I decided to inaugurate the occasion by making fish and chips, which I seldom make at home because it stinks up the house, makes a lot of mess, and takes an inordinate amount of time for the payoff. Nevertheless, it is also delicious.

The fish selection here is about as shameful as in Colorado, which is truly a pity because we are so much nearer to the coast. I honestly want to wager it's based on consumer habits; people do not have very creative palates around here, and so there are typically several kinds of salmon, a lot of shrimp, and some various mild white fishes like tilapia and flounder. They also usually have cod, but of course when I actually want cod they don't have any. So I got this fish called "rockfish" instead. Apparently in addition to being called rockfish, it's also called black bass. And also called redfish. And also called a bunch of other shit. I wish that the fish counter would have the Latin nomenclature on what they've put out there, because if it's one thing the United States fish exchange likes to do is make up crazy new names for shit, but anyway.

Made a beer batter, which was delicious. Made some thick cut fries, delicious. Got the can of Batchelor's, delicious. Pickled onion on the side? Check. Whip up some tartar sauce. Get out the ketchup.

I look up the fish on the internet, and apparently it's yet another fish where the fishery is endangered from overfishing and unsustainable habits. I HATE getting those kinds of fish, I feel like a shithead getting them. But then I figure I've already bought it, I've got to eat it. And OH MY GOD NO WONDER THAT SHIT IS ENDANGERED. IT IS FUCKING DELICIOUS. It's way better than cod. Cod is a very bland fish, you rely on the condiments to complement the flavor and improve it, because it doesn't have much of a flavor of its own. This fish is delicious by itself, and with all the other amazing sides, even better.

When I was in Cornwall I got fish and chips with Plaice once. And that was a bad fish. That fish can go to hell.

This post brought to you by being pointless. Hope you enjoyed, suckas.

Thursday, April 28, 2011


Another crazy dream: fictionalized fantasy world, a la Witchfinder General. Late Renaissance to early Enlightenment. Witches have never been ascribed mythical attributes, because they are quite real, as well as all of the terrible deeds attributed to them. Witch hunting is just as literal, shooting them out of the sky with crossbows while they rain fire and plague down upon unsuspecting towns.

Problem is, warlocks exist as well, although they keep their existence secret. A lot of the terrible things attributed to witches is actually the warlocks carrying out strange experiments, repeatedly failing, and then covering up their failures by using the witches as a scapegoat. The more "public" witch activities, which are nowhere near as violent or outrageous as they are made out to be (and in fact the hatred is magnified exponentially through the use of the new medium, the 'book'), and are fueled by warlock operations aimed at deflection and deception.

In my dream this was cast as a cross between an RPG setting and a novel series setting (it alternated back and forth). And in waking, is really sort of cheesy. But that's what dream logic sort of turns out to be. Would be, honestly, a pretty potentially fun RPG setting, but nothing would probably ever come of it. I guess it's fun to document dreams.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011


Last night I dreamt that there was a giant event center made out of dicarded raw meat parts that was light-as-air, and just floated around the country for different events. And people were really shocked that I hadn't heard of it.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011


Look at the weather report: Torrential downpour of rain, 100% chance. Look out the back window. See nothing. "huh" I say. Walk to the front of the house, look out the front door: horizontally falling sheets. Go back to the back window, driveway is already flooding a little bit.


It's the season of free car washes.

Monday, March 28, 2011


Sailor Moon Pokemon:

Sailor Mercury : Ice
Sailor Venus : Normal/Electric
Sailor Mars : Fire/Psychic
Sailor Moon : Normal
Tuxedo Mask : Normal/Grass
Sailor Jupiter : Electric/Grass
Sailor Saturn : Ghost/Dark
Sailor Uranus : Ground/Flying
Sailor Neptune: Water
Sailor Pluto : Dragon/Dark

Yes, we have been obessively playing Pokemon Black/White AND watching Sailor Moon. You wanna make something of it, bub? Gen V pokemon are weird. Like the Gothic Lolita pokemon. What? And the pokemon that is a ghost of a human who carries around a deathmask of its own face, which it occasionally looks at, and cries. WHY.

Thursday, March 10, 2011



Planting thyme, tarragon, coriander, and rosemary to sprout; down in the basement with a grow light.

To Do:

Get the basil and parsley sprouting in sprouting trays, since they're being transplanted. Get some more planters. Order tomato seeds. Get more planting soil; prep sprouting trays for tomatoes. Ooh, maybe start some dwarf watermelons, train those along the trellis.

Spring has sprung and I gotta make sure I don't miss the boat this year.

Also should pop into a garden store and get another nicotiana or two as a nice little thing for the backyard. Would actually SURVIVE here (screw you colorado).

The strawberries are all coming up; hopefully we'll get some fruit out of those bastards this year. Again, screw you colorado.

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